


I Can Take Care of Myself

by waltztangocache



Category: Friends at the Table (Podcast)
Genre: Forgiveness, Found Family, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Regret, They love each other, spoilers up to sih32
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-09
Updated: 2019-06-09
Packaged: 2020-04-23 06:37:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,201
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19145557
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/waltztangocache/pseuds/waltztangocache
Summary: While the party travels to the Mark of The Erasure, Ephrim takes some time to talk to Throndir.





	I Can Take Care of Myself

**Author's Note:**

> Ephrim and Throndir's new bonds were, simply put, too much for me to handle. This could be read as gen but let's be honest with ourselves.

It didn’t take a genius to figure out that Lord Ephrim, at the moment, had a lot on his mind. 

Obviously, being in a leadership role was stressful in and of itself, especially in a community that seemed to teeter on the brink of disaster the way the Last University did. There was The Heat and The Dark too, the little patches of dark fire that stayed outside the stardust, thankfully, but that were never so far away that one could forget they were there. This, of course, led to the Advocate, that thing made of stolen bones that they were on a death march towards so soon after having spent a month on the road. Then there was Ephrim’s… illness. And, shit, what did his hand mean if The Heat and The Dark could mark Hella, Hella who he had seen kill a Star without breaking a sweat, and not make so much as a mark on her skin? Still, as trivial as it seemed, Ephrim was spending less of his time worrying about existential threats and more of it worrying about...

Ephrim shot a glance to the back of their traveling party where Throndir was riding, trailing behind the rest of the group with Kodiak trotting on the ground next to him. Throndir’s eye caught his, then quickly looked away. Nothing had been simple for a long time, but Ephrim couldn’t tell when things had gotten so complicated.

“You’re not paying attention to me, are you?” Ephrim looked over to see Adaire riding next to him, an eyebrow cocked.

“I was, I just-” Ephrim sighed. “You’re right, I wasn’t. What were you saying?”

She gestured out at the land in front of them. “Just that it looks like the land here is fairly solid, and,” she said, pointing to the daisy compass hovering by the ear of Ephrim’s horse, “there don’t seem to be any dangerous plants up ahead. So, if you want to take a break, I can keep us moving.”

“I don’t know, I feel fine-”

“Well, maybe you could go check in with Throndir? See how our stock of rations is holding up?”

Now it was Ephrim’s turn to raise an eyebrow. “I see what you’re doing, Adaire.”

Adaire feigned surprise. “I have no clue to what you’re referring.”

Ephrim sighed, gesturing with his bad hand while his good one kept a vice grip on his horse’s reins. “I can take care of myself, Adaire. After everything that happened in Alcyon, I thought Throndir could use some space to figure things out, that’s all.”

“Fair enough, I’m just... concerned. Seems like everyone is pissed at Throndir, Throndir included. But it’s not my business.” Adaire glanced over. “You really can take a break, though, I have us covered.”

So Ephrim let his horse fall back through the group, waving up at Fero flying above them, updating the party on their progress one by one until he did, eventually, reach Throndir, riding at the back. As Ephrim approached Kodiak trotted up to meet him. Ephrim smiled down at him, and when he looked up Throndir’s eyes were on him, a nervous expression on his face. Ephrim spoke quickly. “I just wanted to let you guys know that we’re planning on stopping for the night in about another hour and a half.”

Throndir knit his brows together. “Thanks for letting me know?”

“...How are our supplies looking?”

“We still have extra of pretty much everything.” Throndir sighed and reached up to scratch the back of his head. “Look, Ephrim, I don’t know what I can say to you. If you came back here to chastise me you should know that Hella and Red Jack both beat you to it.”

Ephrim’s eyes went wide. “Jesus, Throndir, I’m not here to yell at you.”

“Then why are you here!?” At Throndir’s raised voice Highwater glanced back nervously, and Ephrim shot her a reassuring thumbs up before turning his attention back to Throndir. He spoke again, quiet this time. “What do you want?”

“I just want to make sure you’re okay, Throndir. I’m worried about you.”

“Well, don’t be.” Throndir stared down at his lap, fidgeting with the reins of his horse. “Things are shitty, but I’ll get over it. And if you never forgive me, well, I’ll get over that too.”

Now it was Ephrim’s turn to raise his voice. “What the hell are you saying? Of course they’re all going to forgive you.”

“You don’t know tha-”

“Yes, I do.” Ephrim moved his horse to stop in front of Throndir’s forcing him to look at him, damnit. “We’re a family, Throndir. You and I spent ten years building up the University with Corsica and Rosana and Jack and everyone else, that doesn’t just go away just because you fucked up. We’ve all fucked up, Throndir, but the difference is you’re one of maybe eight people in this world I know I can trust no matter what, because I know that you would never, never hurt somebody if you weren’t sure it was the right thing to do. One way or another, you knew Benjamin would be okay.” Ephrim wiped an angry tear out of his eye. “Didn’t you?”

When Ephrim looked up at Throndir he saw an expression of shock on his face. “Y-Yeah, yeah, of course I did. You know how much I love that kid, I would never-”

“Then what,” Ephrim asked, “are you sorry for?”

Throndir buried his face in his hands, and his shaking voice came out muffled. “I wish I wasn’t what I am.”

“I know.” Ephrim moved his horse back alongside Throndir’s, reaching over to lay a hand on his back. “I could never be mad at you for doing what you thought was right. I only wish you had told me earlier. I could have helped you. You shouldn’t have had to deal with all of this on your own.”

“I didn’t want you to know what I was, but I couldn’t just stand by while that bastard wizard hurt you. I just wanted to protect you.”

“Thank you for protecting me from Arell, Throndir, but I don’t need to be protected from you.” In spite of himself, Ephrim breathed out a little laugh. “I can take care of myself, Throndir. We’re a team, okay, no matter what. All of us,” Ephrim said, gesturing to the group in front of them, “but you and I especially. Right, Kodiak?”

Kodiak barked in agreement, drawing a laugh out of Throndir. “I don’t deserve you, Eph.”

“Do I need to start over?”

Throndir smiled. “No, I got it. Thanks.”

“No problem.” Ephrim sighed. “I suppose we should catch up to everyone. I should make sure Adaire is doing alright by herself, anyway. We can talk more once we set up camp?”

“Sounds perfect.”

Together they pushed their horses to catch up with the rest of the group, having fallen behind while they talked. As Ephrim retook his place at the front of the pack, Adaire came up next to him. “I take it I was wrong and you never should have taken my advice?”

“Yup.” Adaire chuckled and Ephrim felt a weight lift off his shoulders.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to you for reading and to Dre and Andi for making them Like That. You can find me at twitter.com/waltztangocache or at fourteenfifteen.tumblr.com for critical reactions, smart jokes, and fun interaction between good friends.


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